Relevant Reciprocal Link Trading Information:
This script allows you to check your reciprocal links free to see if link partners are still linking back at your site. I do not think it is 100% accurate, but it has worked pretty well on a number of tests I have done.
Most reciprocal link requests are complete garbage, and most spammy reciprocal links probably do not help sites out that much in Google's search results.
Generally if you can afford a decent marketing budget I would not recommend trading links with anyone who you trusted so little that you felt you had to frequently check up on them. Instead of trying to develop link partnerships it may be better building friendships or business partnerships.
Jim Boykin has some great posts about reciprocal links:
In Balancing the Link Equation Stuntdubl also explains that it is a good idea to mix up the types of links you are relying on, instead of doing things like just hoping to trade your way to the top.
15.03.2011